Becoming A Doula As A Single Parent
I came into birth work as a single parent, and let me just say that it has been quite the journey. I didn’t have any family near to lean on either so I really have had to curate a community. When I first started, I remember hearing other doulas say they had put their dreams on the back burner until their kids were older and I completely understand why. When looking into becoming a doula, I remember seeing that it was one of the best jobs to have if you needed to bring your own kids to work with you. I disagree with that now because typically when you’re serving a family, you want to be able to focus on them. The reality is, it’s not that simple when you have your own kids with you. Your kids will require your attention and it can be a lot to juggle the two.
Being a doula while being a single parent can have its challenges. But it’s not impossible, so let’s talk about the ways you can be a doula and single parent at the same time.
If you have family near that you trust, lean into them.
This is obviously the easiest route to go because it can help eliminate the cost associated with having to pay a sitter hourly. Explain your job to them and make sure they know you could call at anytime once you’re on call.
If you don’t have family near that you trust, have multiple babysitters.
When I say multiple, I mean like 6-8 that you can call on. If it’s the middle of the night and your primary sitter doesn’t answer, you don’t want to have to scramble finding someone. If you have multiple sitters, it’s more likely someone will answer the phone when you need them. It’s important to explain your job and make it clear that you’ll need them to have their phones available.
A system to use to secure a babysitter:
Pay them weekly for being on call with you. This can be a flat rate of $25-50 a week or some people pick an amount to pay per day. This amount ranges from $5-$20 a day in my experience.
Pick an amount to pay hourly if you have to call them in. I highly recommend setting a cap. For example, $15 per hour, capped at $150 per day. This will help you financially and it still makes sure your sitter gets paid for their time. If you don’t set a cap you could be paying hundreds of dollars and that will quickly make you feel like this work is not worth it.
Make sure to have an agreement with your sitter on how quickly you need them to get to your home (unless you agree to drop kids off at their home). I personally have a clause in my contract that says I get 2 hours to get to my client after they call. This means I need my sitter to be at my home within 30 minutes to ensure I get out of the door in time. I live in a major metropolitan so that timing is important for me, but if you live in a smaller area, you may have your sitter get to you within an hour. That is completely dependent on your area, your client, and your contract.
I find most of my sitters on Care or Sittercity but if you want a free option, check on Facebook for babysitter groups in your city. If you decide to go this route, make sure to really get to know the sitter before using them. I’ve found some great people but scams and flaky sitters can sometimes be in those groups.
3. Find a doula to trade off time with.
If you know another doula in the area who has kids, you can help each other out when possible. This takes away the financial aspect because you are trading a service versus money. If you’re going to go this route I recommend having at least 2 doulas to lean into just in case one happens to be at a birth or occupied with something.
4. Find a local home daycare.
What I have found is that home daycares sometimes offer night time care so if you have to go in the middle of the night, you can drop your children off somewhere they’re already comfortable. If you’re working a lot and your child is not in school during the week, this can help lower the cost because you’ll pay an amount for the day or week versus paying hourly. This normally takes some coordination and building of a relationship with the daycare owner, so explain your job and see if they can work something out with you.
5. Look into some parenting groups for your area and see if there are any Stay at Home parents looking for additional money.
This is a great way to go about it because typically their schedules are more open and you would be helping each other out in the process. For example, Facebook has lots of groups for moms in my city and people are often posting looking for side hustles. That is a great opportunity to see if they would be interested in working with you.
6. Charge your clients what you would need to make a profit even after childcare.
This one is a hard one because sometimes we don’t want to feel like we’re charging too much, but you also know you have to make a decent living. It’s okay to compare your prices to another doula, but keep in mind your circumstances may be different and they may not have the same financial responsibilities as you.
7. Only offer prenatal or postpartum services.
This is what a lot of single parents do for a while. Prenatal and postpartum services can follow a schedule, and you can have it to where you only schedule work when your kids are in school or occupied. In turn, you don’t have to worry about childcare, which will make life a little easier.
If you’re not a doula yet and considering becoming one, I recommend reading my post about Madriella (I even threw a coupon code in there) while you’re on your search for training organizations.
